In my work, I give a lot of formal written advice on possible tax issues. Apparently this has affected my daily writing style.
It was brought to my attention by my sweetheart that I may need to work on my writing style for my non- professional communications. I’m not sure what he means? For example, I sent him this heartfelt love letter, which I think clearly demonstrates my ability to effectively communicate in a style that is both appropriate and unambiguous to the situation at hand.
But please judge for yourself – Be warned the following text is pretty heady stuff.
Dear Mr. Mejia,
I affectionately hope you are having a productive and satisfying day. It is my intention to take this opportunity to let you know the extent to which I enjoy our continued romantic association, which is considerable. I sincerely desire that you find our continued amorous involvement mutually beneficial as well.
Additionally, I am composing this correspondence to inquire as to scheduling an appointment in the near future for an act of coitus. With said act to be performed at your convenience. If you would be as gracious as to consider a personal request, I would like to make a petition for an act of physical intimacy in “the male superior position” or as designated by Dr. Alfred Kinsey in his 1948 published work Sexual Behavior in the Human Male as “the English-American position.”
For reasons of clarity and full disclosure, please distinguish the contextual use of the designation “male superior” as a description for the aforementioned proposition as a technical term for the requested act and in no way conveys any assertion or acknowledgment of actual male superiority in the typical meaning of the word “superior”. If you would like further elucidation on the matter, I would be most amenable to providing you with further reference materials you may deem necessary.
If you are responsive to this invitation, please contact me with any scheduling recommendations, questions or requests.
It is also acknowledged and understood that any arrangement will not be considered a binding contract and neither party is under any obligation to perform once an arranged time is mutually agreed upon.
With heartfelt regards,
(And people say I lack romance in my soul)